I’m super afraid to say it because I don’t want to jinx it, but maybe school is going well.
2L is a really strange thing. You see, I barely feel like I’ve got a handle on anything. I walk around worrying that my blood pressure is going to get out of control again. I worry about meal prep and stocking my locker and the fridge at school. I worry about deadlines and meetings. Yoga. Friendships. Church. I worry about technology. Basically, I’m a wad of worry and worry is what law school has been for me.
And yet… 1Ls ask me how to do things.
It’s such an abrupt shift from feeling like, “Okay… I’ve survived the first year. I’m one third of the way done and I haven’t lost my mind just yet…” to having others come to me as if I have a wealth of experience and wisdom that will aid them on their journeys.
For the record, I don’t know how to do things. I’m still just trying to get by.
Even so, school seems to be falling into place and running smoothly. I dropped a class after a minor intervention from a couple of friends who pointed out that I may have been a little too ambitious with my schedule. Besides that minor hiccup, I’m really enjoying things.
Most of my time is spent on Wrongful Convictions stuff. I’m in the clinic and have been assigned to a client whose story really matters to me. Another chunk of my time is spent on normal classes, my favorite of which is First Amendment. Journal work takes up the rest of my time, and after making a change to the topic I’m writing about, I’m pretty happy with my choice to do a journal. I was a little concerned that it would be too much. I’m also on the board of Pride Law, which I’m sort of inadequate for… I haven’t spent much time at all really learning the things that should probably be prerequisites for such a board position, but I’m learning, and the other board members are letting me learn.
In other news, I’m dating someone and I feel like I learn things every day about what it can be to partner up. I didn’t know how stabilizing it can be… to check in each day… to hold hands (I love holding hands)… to have someone text to make sure I got home okay… someone who tells me it’s okay… who listens and is on my side… who fills me with peace and calm…
I’ve seen a lot of the volatility of relationships and I struggle to trust that my person and I aren’t that… that it’s possible for us to make each other better and build each other up, rather than tearing each other down.
In other life update headlines:
Kate to Visit Family Over Fall Break: Moose’s First Flight
Semester Starts Amid Accusations of Sexual Harassment*
Learn to Drink in Moderation: Believe it or Not, Moderation is Possible
Hanging with Noam Chomsky: Campus Speech Event
And that’s all, folks! Take care of yourself and drop me a line when you get a chance. 🙂
*This one blew my mind a little bit, and you should ask me about it in person… it’s a story.