For the record, I did not grow up in a household of doomsdayers… but I did grow up in a household that, in my memory, was always in a position to hunker down for two-plus weeks without needing to go anywhere.
I’m not really sure if it was just a matter of hating to be without something we needed or desired, but we always had what I, as an adult, have considered to be an excessive amount of everything. Cheerios. Toilet paper. Frozen chicken. Shampoo. Dog food. Tylenol. Ice cream. Bacon. And, though not exactly a survival necessity… books and movies.
I’ve also always been drawn to the post-apocalyptic genre. I’m the type who has had a plan for the zombie apocalypse since I was probably 12 years old… or whenever it was that my dad first had me watch The Night of the Living Dead. Also, I might be making this up, but I believe he once told me where to meet him and my mom if the local Air Force base was ever bombed. We’re slightly-pessimistic planners, and seemingly made for hunkering down during a wide-scale pandemic.
Recommendation: There’s a 2007 2-episode movie-thing on Amazon Video called Pandemic. It stars Tiffani Amber-Thiessen and will feed your COVID anxiety while also making you wonder what Kelly Kapowski is doing nowadays. And, hey, check out the rest of the cast… not the worst I’ve ever seen.
Now the excess of my childhood no longer seems excessive, but has become a comforting and helpful thing. When I think back on my up-bringing I have generally hated how it shaped me into a compulsive hoarder, but now, my ridiculous personality quirk has magically equipped me for the current and unforeseeable TP shortage in ways that I never would have fathomed. In my possession, I have 24 containers of tic tacs… that I purchased before Americans thought anything of Coronavirus.
Carmex, coffee beans, and organic caramel sauce galore! I’m not saying I’ll be healthy or happy with what I have if the ish really hits the fan in coming weeks. I may, for instance, end up drinking organic red pepper salad dressing for entire meals, but in the apocalypse calories are calories. Besides, I have enough Flintstones Vitamins to stave off scurvy for a year, probably.
On a more sobering note, I signed into my first Zoom class today to do a test run before the University of Arizona goes online tomorrow, and my professor predicted that education has now changed forever. He’s usually right about such things. He started switching us over to online classes weeks before anyone in the U.S. was talking about any shutdowns. I think he’s probably right. But it’s sad. I’ve always believed education should be conducted in person and by people.
I’m supposed to be graduating in a couple of months, and though I suspect my official end of law school won’t be delayed, I doubt there will be a ceremony. On the one hand, that’s sad, but on the other hand, I’ve never really liked making a fuss about things anyway. What actually concerns me is the Bar exam. I’m supposed to be taking it in July… hopefully they can make that work somehow.
Another prediction of my professor is that grading of the Bar and our regular classes will be rather gentler than usual, with a bit of a grace period for people to get used to new processes. One can only hope.
I also have to say that COVID-19 has not put a damper on my love life just yet. I decided to get back to online dating mere days before the panic started, and I wouldn’t want my subscription to go to waste, so instead of the routine coffee or dinner for a first date, I’m meeting up with potential mates for nice walks outside. It’s actually rather sweet and far less awkward than many of my first dates of the past. After all, it is Spring… the sun is shining and if it worked as a time for Bambi and his buddies, perhaps I can become delightfully twitterpated even in the time of COVID-19.
Dark humor and sarcasm aside, I hope everyone is staying safe, adjusting to the isolation, and finding some peace in the pandemic. Keep calm and carry on never had more meaning to me than it does right now.