My Top Ten for a Public Number Two

English: This is used to pee in the bathroom.

English: This is used to pee in the bathroom. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


When you gotta go, you gotta go, right?


Not to turn Still Growing into a crass, poopy place, but, as my friend Maria says, “It’s natural.”












5. Parks – So, the stalls may not have doors on them… at least I know I won’t make the situation worse than it already is. Just make sure you keep some TP on hand in the car at all times.


4. Fry’s Marketplace – I’m not sure why, but I’ve used this one several times. Positive: there are rarely other people in there, so it’s relatively private in contrast with some other public washrooms.


3. The Student Bathroom at Work – This one’s weird, I know, but if I use the teacher bathroom, everyone knows it was me and I win the “Don’t Go in There After Me” Dundie Award. Also, it cracks me up how teen girls act about poop, so I like the feeling that I’m educating students about the real world by using their bathroom with none of their timidity and shame.


2. Barns & Noble – I’m not really sure why, but it seems like everyone poops at B&N. You just have to watch Mean Girls to realize that even the plastics do their business there.


1. Starbucks – Okay, so Starbucks is number one in my book for just about everything, but you have to admit that their bathrooms are always clean enough that I’m not grossed out, but never really clean enough that I’d feel guilty about doing something serious in there. Also, you get your own private room rather than having to deal with stalls.


Wow. After attempting to make this list, I realize that public number twos stink (pun intended). I only came up with half as many locations as I thought I’d have :-(.


You’ll have to fill in the blanks for me. What are the other top 5 spots for a public number two?



4 thoughts on “My Top Ten for a Public Number Two

    • You know, I’ve been trying to think about the Target bathrooms ever since you commented, but I actually don’t think I like them purely because of quality control. Some of them are perfect, while others are horrendous… I think it’s different in the ladies’ room because women often bring children in and they ruin everything, so Target sometimes has some pretty bad stuff in the ladies’ room. It’s probably pretty awesome in the mens’ room, though. 🙂

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