Assassin’s Creed, I’m disappointed in you.

Assassin's Creed cover.

Image via Wikipedia

I finally beat the first Assassin’s Creed.

It’s taken me freakin’ forever, because my schedule was so full, but I’ve finally triumphed; the credits rolled, and I have to say that it was a little bit of a let-down. Of course I’m going to get the second game, because it wasn’t so much of a let-down that I don’t hope for something awesome in the next piece of the story. It’s just…

Spoiler Alert!

Okay, the game is really repetitive, first of all. Most of the game happens in 3 cities: Acre, Jerusalem, and Damascus. Nice, huh? There’s a little bit of stuff that happens in other places, but those three are where you spend most of your time. Each city is divided into three districts: each including an assassination target. In order to plan your kill, you have to run about the district doing stuff and collecting info. You end up climbing on top of like 7 or so towers or look-out points in each district (yeah that’s like 70 total, and that doesn’t count the towers you climb in the Kingdom). At first, I really liked climbing the towers, because the scenery is beautiful, and you get to do epic swan dives off the towers into piles of hay… but that’s only fun for the first 30 or so times you do it.

Then, there’s the pick-pocketing. I had the worst trouble with this at first; my students had to explain to me what was happening, and even then, I was pretty horrible at it. However, there are like 2 pick-pocket missions you can do in each district, so again, really repetitive. There are also about 2 informant missions (you assassinate a bunch of bad guys), 1 eaves-dropping mission, and 1 interrogation mission you can do in each district. Those didn’t bother me as much, except that there were crazy beggar ladies who always got in my way on the informant missions, and I’d accidentally stab them and get in trouble. Then I’d have to run away and hide, which you also do a million times, and also gets repetitive.

The storyline was pretty compelling, although really slow. I usually don’t like games in which you don’t get to change the outcome or choose to be a good guy or a bad guy, but the storyline here was engaging enough that I didn’t mind that. I did, however, severely dislike the ending.

The storyline splits into two parts with past events where you’re an assassin and present events where you’re the assassin’s decedent who is being held captive and has to climb into a crazy machine called the animus to appease his captors. The assassin storyline finished up satisfactorily… it was a cliff-hanger, but nothing too frustrating. The present-day storyline was what angered me. At some point in the game, I ended up taking a pen from my captors and slipping it up my sleeve. I wanted to use that pen to stab the jerk-wad who was going to kill me, but I never got the chance. As far as I know, that pen is still up my sleeve. I hope I get to use it in the second game. Also, the present-day storyline ends in a cliff-hanger too, and I felt like nothing was resolved. It was like watching Lost: 5 seasons in, and I still have no clue what’s going on. They just keep presenting questions without answers.

JJ Abrams… did you start writing Assassin’s Creed and then leave it for lesser writers to try to resolve?

I suppose I will reserve full condemnation of the game until I’ve had a chance to play the second installment, but if it doesn’t answer some questions, I’m going to…

I’m going to…

Well, I’m going to complain! Because that’s the only recourse a girl has when her video game disappoints.


4 thoughts on “Assassin’s Creed, I’m disappointed in you.

  1. I promise you, Assassin’s Creed II isn’t nearly as repetitive because Ubisoft added side missions, and the story takes place in Florence, Tuscany, Monteriggioni and Venice, and some halfway point known as Forli. Obviously, it’s even more gorgeous than the first. And there’s wonderful music. And Ezio has prettier robes. You get to battle the “rival family” gang-style, and you can swim this time. What made me sad, though, is that you don’t get to play as Desmond at all. There’s no present-day storyline, for the most part. :C Brotherhood is like ACII on steroids; side missions, assassination contracts, and you get to play as Desmond and explore the Auditore Villa in Monteriggioni! 😀

  2. You should refrain from lending games that you think really suck to people who periodically review your blog. I like it so far though… I look forward to role-playing a single handed interruption in the tide of human history by sneakily assassinating members of the Knights Templar. Just think, if only it were real Thomas Jefferson and Ben Franklin never would have participated in the worship of bail.

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